Liberal Christians, who accept gays and believe a woman has the right to choose, say I am not a Christian unless I disavow conservative Christians, who have polar-opposite views. Conservative Christians say I am not a Christian unless I admit that gays go to hell, as well as baby-killers, unless they are converted and repent from their evil ways.
Christians who accept the Prosperity Gospel say I am not a Christian unless I pay them money so I can get rich, which will prove I have faith in God. Christians who disavow such beliefs say I am not a Christian unless I summarily reject the aforementioned Christians.
There still exists the old battles between Calvinists and Arminianists, and also battles between pre-tribulationalists and post-tribulationists. Must I be a Baptist and get dunked under water, or a Catholic and eat a cracker and sip some grape juice?
Then there are political Christians who say that unless I join their party I am in danger of God’s wrath. Of course, there are some Christians who actually know for a fact that I am a Christian. It works like this: America is a Christian Nation, I am an American, therefore I am a Christian.
Thank God I wasn’t born in Canada…